‹ Back to Blog

Talking to Your Inner Child: Cultivating Positive Self-Talk

What makes one of the most popular behavioral trends of late is the practice of going back to who we were as children, before we were shaped by life experiences—a state of purity, joy, and witness-consciousness.

“The whole purpose of spiritual evolution is to return to one’s true nature which is like a child.” —Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

The inner child represents our emotional core, shaped by early experiences, joys, fears, and unresolved wounds from childhood. Often, as we grow this part of our memory tends to carry unresolved feelings of neglect, abandonment, abuse, rejection, or misunderstanding. By acknowledging and addressing the inner child with unmet needs, we sit with this part of our past to support and nurture the roots of our emotional well-being. Talking to this part of ourselves helps heal past wounds, release old patterns, and foster a sense of safety and self-worth.

How Does One Talk to Their Inner Child?

Initially, it may look like an exercise in make-believe, but once you get to the deeper end, you find relief, joy, and a sense of lightness.

  1. Create a Safe Space. Find a quiet, comfortable place where you won’t be disturbed. Dim the lights to create a calming atmosphere.
  2. Be Intentional. Before you begin, set a clear intention to connect with your inner child. For example, “I want to listen to and nurture my inner child.”
  3. Practice Deep Breathing. You can practice a few rounds of alternate nostril breathing for five minutes to calm the mind and body and prepare you for a deep dive.
  4. Visualize Your Inner Child. Close your eyes and imagine yourself as a child. Picture the younger version of you—what they looked like, what they wore, what they liked doing, their expressions, how they interacted with their friends and environment.
  5. Start a Conversation. Gently speak to your inner child in your mind or out loud. Ask questions like
    “How are you feeling?”
    “What do you need from me?”
    “What are you afraid of?”
    “What makes you happy?”
    Listen for any feelings, thoughts, or images that arise in response.
  6. Offer Comfort and Reassurance. If your inner child expresses fear, sadness, or other emotions, reassure them with kindness. Say things like, “You are safe now,” or “I’m here for you, and I love you.”
  7. Revisit Childhood Memories. Recall a specific memory where you felt hurt, scared, or ignored. Imagine your adult self stepping into that memory to comfort and support your younger self. Rewrite the memory by giving your inner child the love and validation they needed at that moment. It is important to stay aware that this is an incident from the past and it is not here to bother or hurt you anymore—that life has changed and moved on and you are much more resilient today. The memory or the impression holds no power over you anymore.
  8. Write a Letter to Your Inner Child. Take some time to write a letter to your younger self. Express love, forgiveness, and understanding. Acknowledge their struggles and remind them of their strengths.
  9. Become Playful. Engage in activities your inner child enjoyed, such as drawing, dancing, or playing games. In a sense, become the child. For example, if you are drawing something, draw as if you were a 5-year-old. This helps strengthen the connection in a lighthearted way.
  10. End with Gratitude. Before concluding this activity, thank your inner child for showing up and sharing with you. Remind them that you’re always there for them. You can end with this beautiful gratitude meditation in the gentle voice of Gurudev. All you need to do is follow the instructions.
  1. Reflect and Journal. After the session, write down any insights, emotions, or messages that might have come up. This helps deepen your understanding of your inner child and factors or impressions that were formative for any of your current behaviors.

As you practice this more often, you will find impressions and patterns from your childhood that were holding you back in life are no longer able to control you. Connecting with your inner child is a gentle and transformative process. With patience and practice, it can lead to profound healing and self-awareness.

How to Overcome Obstacles to Developing This Habit

Fear of confronting old wounds can hold you back but recognize the resistance and don’t be hard on yourself. Acknowledge that healing takes time and a lot of courage. Start with the right mindset and incorporate the following pointers to help the exercise become easier. 

  • Create a safe environment where you feel secure and relaxed. You may also seek guidance from a therapist or a trusted mentor.
  • Commit to regular inner child check-ins, but don’t pressure yourself. Start with small steps, like a 5-minute visualization.
  • Replace harsh inner dialogue with affirmations. Remind yourself that talking to your inner child is an act of self-love.
  • Join communities or groups focused on inner healing to share insights and encouragement.

How Does Talking to One’s Inner Child Build Self-Esteem?

Addressing childhood hurts helps release feelings of inadequacy and shame, creating space for self-acceptance. By being kind to your inner child, you learn to speak to yourself with love and respect, cultivating a positive inner dialogue. Validating your inner child’s emotions reinforces the belief that your feelings and needs are important.

Healing past traumas empowers you to face current challenges with greater confidence and calmness, enhancing emotional resilience. This process also enables you to embrace your true self, free from external judgments and past limitations.

Using Breath as a Tool

Gurudev teaches that the core of our existence is bliss, positivity, and joy, though it may be surrounded by negative ions. He emphasizes that we can swiftly overcome the negative emotions and impressions we’ve accumulated over the years through the power of breath. As he puts it, “Just because a room has been dark for many years doesn’t mean it will take just as long to light up. All you need to do is light a lamp, and the darkness disappears.”

Engaging with your inner child is not merely a therapeutic practice but an ongoing journey of self-discovery and healing. In a world where much of our life is lived in our minds, this connection lays the groundwork for self-love and positive self-talk, fundamentally transforming the quality of your life.

Posted in: