This poem features the central themes of my “Unafraid Storyteller” retreat:
here is a story about you
that I heard from a gossiping angel
who was snacking on a strawberry
in the tree in my backyard this past summer
the angel said that
you used to soar
above the world
they said that
you were once surrounded
by so many miracles
that nobody could tell
where the wonder began and you ended
you were a swirl
of soaring grace
but one day (a long while ago)
a comet came roaring down
and the sky came apart all around you
and after being so wounded
you became grounded to gravity
and found yourself wounded and walking
in a foreign land
eventually, you were captured by those
who told you that flying was now
too dangerous
they said that
that you would enjoy
the safety of confinement
so, they put you in a cage
and clipped your wings
for “your own safety”
the angel went on to say that
for years you stared through
the iron bars and fantasized about
taking flight once more
~ to feel the great wind in your face
~ to be untethered to earthly things
~ to be able to flirt with heaven again
I heard that you dreamed
every night about being
able to reclaim your freedom
“but your freedom never came,”
the angel told me
and over time,
you fell into a deep despair
“I’ll never leave this place,” you repeated
to yourself over and over
The angel said that in your
most desperate hour
you prayed for God to let
your heart stop beating
so you could become a ghost
in order to feel yourself become
tangled up in a hot summer breeze
– even if just for a second
I heard that you prayed to Spirit
to allow your suffering to end
Even if that meant that you
would be swept up by oblivion
I began to weep as I listened to your story
because it sounded so familiar
the angel reported somberly that
your prayers were never answered
and you resigned yourself
to being stuck in the cage forever
then the angel said that
during one winter night
(not too long ago)
a moonbeam winked at you
through the gaps of your cage bars
and how overtook you were
by the soft glow
and how you sang a psalm about
how lovely it all was
the moon heard you
And changed it’s hue from
white to lavender
and suddenly you remembered
something you were told when
you first hatched
your voice can
change the world
and that
there is no prison
that can hold your song
the angel said that even though
they clipped your wings
and put you in a cage
you let your voice grow feathers
and it slips out through the cage every
night to explore the world
every time you open
your mouth and sing
you escape the prison
that you thought you
would never leave
I heard that you learned
that you didn’t need your
wings to be close to heaven
you just needed
to find your voice
and as the angel hugged me goodbye
she told me
that once you started singing
~ you never stopped
and that now you are surrounded
by so many miracles that nobody can
tell where the wonder begins and you end
you are still such a swirl
of soaring grace
oh, my love,
as the strawberry scented
angel rose up I shouted
how I couldn’t wait to hear
your song
because
maybe it will
help me find
the way out
of my own
~ john roedel